As I sit staring at this screen so desperately wanting the words to explode out of my head, my mind drifts. The impact of losing you has affect me to my very core...I am not the man I once was. Part of me is proud of what is being rebuilt from those shattered pieces of what used to be. Another part is scared and confused. Another wants to go back, but then realizes not only is that impossible, it would negate the good things that have come since. All parts, however, are still grieving. Before you died, I was sharp. I could focus. Now, it takes longer to comprehend things, longer to bring ideas to fruition. I've pressed and held the backspace button too many times tonight already...the ideas are there, but the words can't make it from my brain to my fingertips. I wish I could see you and hold you once more...I miss you...I love you.
Sophia Marie
5-29-12
Stillborn
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